When you've had a sofa, well, lounge suite, for nigh on 30 years and it's been recovered and restored a couple of times and MLP suggests, insinuates, hints maybe that he'd like to think about a new one, what do you do?
Firstly, get those little niggles that cause anxiety. Could I part with this suite after all these years? Will I regret parting its company? WHAT, a new lounge!! Why??
But then you begin to find yourself giving sofas in furniture stores cursory glances. And you start to look closely at sofa ads in magazines. And, then, PANIC, you find a sofa that you actually like. A sofa that sends little flutters through your system.
What do you do? You take photos from several angles with your iPhone and take them home to be scrutinised.
Yes, he likes it. So do you. But, I've never been one to rush into a major purchase. So, we persist with the current arrangement for another five months. Yep, five months.
I take these major purchases seriously. They need time to percolate.
Do I R-E-A-L-L-Y like it? Could I live with it long term? I've only coveted it for five months; will I still like it in six ... seven ... thirteen months ... thirty years?
Then, eventually, a decision is made. You take a special trusted friend from school days on a sofa hunting expedition. It's important to try out many sofas, many MANY sofas to ensure the one you looovvee is comfortable, priced reasonably, given the special-trusted-school-friend-seal-of-approval.
And, then, finally, take MLP to sit, in the shop window, as that's where the sofa is on display, to gain his approval on comfort, price, design.
People look at you weirdly when you're sitting on a sofa in a shop window.
But the anxiety pangs return. The indigestion begins. I'm not good at this at all.
But we do it. We order a new sofa ... in a murky green colour to suit its retro vibe ... sign-on-the-dotted-line-pay-the-deposit type order. Wow.
So now it's time for coffee and a wander around the other shops to calm my system.
I'm nervous about our colour choice. It's out there. I like the colour but can I live with it in a sofa???
I send MLP into JB Hi-Fi while I sit outside and ponder. I know he can spend hours in JBs, so I know I have sufficient time to think ... panic ... ponder.
When he emerges, he says, "You want to go back and change the colour to charcoal, don't you?"
Yep, I do. And, yep, we do. Thank goodness for sympathetic sofa sellers.
"Going for the safer option now, are you?"
Oh yeah. We are. I am.
The rest of our goodies just aren't retro enough to handle a murky-green-retro sofa. Charcoal will be fabulous.
And it arrives six weeks after ordering, as promised. And fabulous it is.
And then, see that cushion ... well, I kind of caught the retro vibe bug ... just a little. I'd been wanting to make something out of those nanna-ish souvenir tea towels and now was my chance.
A souvenir tea towel of my current home city plus a bit of pom pom braid and, hey presto, a retro-ish cushion for the retro style sofa.
But ... then, I ventured into my local Salvos store and this is waving to me.
$4! Can you believe it?
My Pop had one of these. Everybody's Pop had one of these. I have to have it. It's the retro bug biting again.
A little bit grungy on top but my trusty Orange Power will fix that in a second.
And then I think ... what about another souvenir tea towel? And so it comes to be.
It takes a couple of days to happen. Staple gun, sand paper, paint brush, dark stain. It's kitsch and retro and I love it.
Nothing better than being able to put your feet up while you watch "The Block".
But, then ... Oh, no ... I hear you sigh. No, it's not another kitschy souvenir tea towel. It's amazing and it's in Bunnings and it's a fraction of the price I've seen it for in the magazines.
An Acapulco chair! Yay! But I'm going to put it inside with my new retro sofa ... and cushion ... and footstool, not outside, which is where I think it's meant to go.
And, so, the transformation of our living room is complete.
A little bit retro.
A bit eclectic.
But comfortable and cozy.
MLP has his new sofa.
Orange moggy hairs are VERY visible on a charcoal sofa.
I don't think the orange moggy cares.